Life And Manners In Congress

Perhaps no people have a kcener sense af the ridiculous than Americnas. It is )erilous for a speaker in the House of epresentatives to venture upon the pahetic. A member of ampie dimensions, ;lufT, merry-looking fnce, and without a article of pathos in his manner, while engaged the other day in a very earnest discussion of the slavery quesiion, wl.ich ie handled with spirit and ability, was so unlucky at one time as to attempt a climax, on the npostacy of the times. - He managed very well till he carne to 5ut on the top-stone, but there he feil flat. " When," said he, " I see" so and áo, proceeding to enumérate some monstrous evils, u it makes me feel tnclunchoïy." So unexpected was this enditig, and so oddly did it contrast with his broad, good-humo red face, thatthe whole House broke out in a roar oí Inughter, some of hem crying, w O, sad !" Such littlc passages do good, especially when exciting questions are up. - Men will never do much mischief so long as they are in the laughing mood. Hearty laughter has a most mellowing influence. Mr. Pettit, a few days since, confributed his share, unintentionally, to the amusement of the House. A spectacled gentleman, past the middle period of life. rather venerable in appearance, of n style of speech indioatingmuch force and shrewdness - no one would suspect him ofdallying with the sentimental. But, the best of men will sometimes yield to temptation. While making his speech on the question of slavery, he undertook to run a contrast between Virginia and New York, and first examined the physical features of the former. All at once, he began to think of babbling brooks. - " Where, in what land," he asked, "do the zephyrs blow more softly, the rills flow more musically, the birds sing more merrily ?" This, from a hard political and a gray-headed gentleman, and right in the middle of an exciting debate completely upset the gravity of the House ; and their uproarious mirth af fecled the orator himself, who spccdily took his flight from the región of rills anc zephyrs. The House, it is said, behaves bette during this session than it has hitherto done. If not, it has certainly been cari catured. So far, thcre has been as mucl orderas could be expected in so la.-ge a body. A good speaker, who has some thing to say, can always command quie and repectful attention. A poor speak er, with nothing to say, has no right to complain if tho House grow reativo anc rather talkative. The hall was built for ornament, anc nothing else. If the architect had tried he could not have built one worse, for botl spectators and listeners, and less adaptec to deliberative purposes. A membe mustpossess a remarkably elear vcice distinct enunciation, and, withal, be very delibérate, to bo hearcí by all, ven withinhe bar. If a speaker pitch his voice on a high key,or become vehement or rnpid, perlmps not one-hnlf of his hearers will mJerstand him. il is this evil, we are re, that often aggravales the disorder of he House. A fewyearsago, we are told, it was ustomary for members to sit within the bar whhtheir hals on - an evidence, we bppose, of theirsturdy republicanism. - Tliey have degenerated so much that :he ïats are now laid aside. Occasionally, lowever, a meniber ualks proudly down n aisle, with his hat on, koeping itthere i'l he takes his scat, when he pulls it off vith the utmost deliberation, as if relucant to conform to so aristocratie a cusom. One thing will be remarked by every tranger, looking down forthefirst time pon this exhibitionof legislative wisdom - and tuis is, the wonderiul fluency of very speaker. No one hesitates, halls, r stammers - young or old, whether he ïas anything to say or not - and it makes no difference what may be the topic. - Wordsare said to bo the representatives f ideas - bul thai proposition finds numeous exceptions in Congress. The hour rule may have done good os i restraint upon this incontinence of of speech ; but it has its evils, too, one of which is, that some members, though ten minutes would suffice for the complete exhibition of their wisdom, feel now a kind of religions obligation to fill up the hour. The diffusiveness of these shortidea gentlemen is intolerable. You will sometimes heara speaker of this kind dealing all through his speech in such superfluities a?, u I beg leave to say, sir j" u Will you permit me to add, Mr. Clrnirman ;" " Allow me, sir," &c, &c.f just as if his privilege to "say" and to "add" what he pleased were really called in question. The gesticularon of speakers is generally indicative of mere muscle than aste. It is astonishing how they sweat sometimes. Not unfrequently they find t necessaryto relieve themselvesof their stocks, so that the wind-pipe may have freer play ; but, unfortunately, the more loudly they speak, the less they are understood. Echoes innumerable ramb!e and sport through the hall in inimitable confusión. We know of no gainersby these violent gasticulations, except the tailors. Broadcloth and the best of stitches cannot stan J every thing. A favorito custom, omong members speaking is, to slap and thump without niercy the desks before them ; and it is especially desirable that the blow should be given at the very moment the emphatic word is pronounced, so as to prevent all possibility of its being heard. It is an admirable art ; and since thes striking appeals seem nbsolutely necessary, it migrht be well for every member to be supplied wilh a little hammer, ond, for the sake of giving listeners a chance to understand him, occupy the first ten or fifieen minutos of his hour in hammering, the rest in speaking. Every member of the House, ex oficio, s an oracle and a prophet. True, the people never dreamed that the candidatos whom they were supporting were giftec in this way ; but there is inspiration, we suppose, in the ampie dome and grandlooking pillarsthat their delibera lions. It is wonderful to see how sooi the most youthful member learns to en act a Jeremiad. The oracle of Delphos used to be visited by certain preliminary symptoms indicaiing the coming on o the paroxysmal afflatus. So, an atten tive observer can always lell when the prophet ie fit is about superveneingin a member of Congress. All at once his countenance assumes an ominous aspee - the eye glares - he falls back a few steps, and shakes his long black locks, i he have any ; then, suddenly lifting him self on tip-toe, hc springs forward six feet, raises his arm, shakes his fore-finger which evidently trernbles with emotion and in his most guttural tones, cries out "I teil gentlemen - I wam them, Mr Speaker - they stand upon a volcano, anc nothing but athin crust is between them and a heaving lake of fiery lava !" if gentlemen are not frightened, it i because they, too, are prophets. Som speaches, like the prophet's scroll, withir and without, are full of woes and lamen tation. Perhaps we may hereaAer speak mor ai largo of this great embodimont of leg islative power. Five maxims to be observed throug life. 1. Never regret what is irretrievably lost. 2. Never bclieve that which seems improbable. 3. Never exposé your disappointment to the world. .4. Never complain of being ill-used. 5. Always speak well of your friends, but of your enomies speak neither good nor evil.